Why do we worry?

Do not be anxious for anything but in everything by prayer and petition, with thanks giving present your request to God and the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Jesus Christ:
Philippians 4:6-7


Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will worry about itself.  Each day has enough troubles of its own.
Matthew 6:34


Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
I Peter 5:7

I have all three of these verses memorized and find myself using them again and again for comfort...so why am I not better at putting them into practice?  I am a worrier.  In fact my father says he thinks I was born a worrier.  When I was a small child I used to genuinely get worried when my dad had vacation from work that we wouldn't have enough money to buy supper.  I would worry about having someone to talk to or sit with at school.  Then when I was a teenager, and found out I would not be able to have my own children I worried about whether someone would want to marry me if he knew I couldn't have children or worse yet that God created me not to have children BECAUSE he didn't want me to get married.

Well...believe it or not, we never ran out of food at our house (even when my dad took time off from work), somehow I always found friends to talk to and sit with at school and I found the most wonderful husband who was not even phased by the fact I could not have children.  In fact, both my husband and I have siblings who are adopted!

So, looking back on my life I realize that God truly did care and have a plan and took care of my every worry.  So, why do I still worry????

I am writing about worry because I was thinking about Kaili(the other baby we were going to adopt but whose birth mother took her back) and worrying about Mira today .  We are at the same point in Mira's adoption that we had been with Kaili's when things fell apart.  Kaili will be 7 months old in a couple of days and probably would have been with us for about two months now.  After losing her, I had so many worries.  What if we are not supposed to adopt, could we love another baby after losing the first one, what if we get another one taken away...the list goes on.

We found out about Mira the same day that we found out Kaili was definitely staying with her birth mom.  I was so worried about seeing Mira's picture because I just didn't think I could grow as attached to her....but I was so wrong.  The process of discovering that Mira was the baby we were meant to have has been a joyful one! God once again proved himself faithful.

When we were in the process of adopting Kaili I felt like everything was working out so perfectly that she had to be the baby meant for us.  I questioned God so much when we "lost" her.  NOW  I see how much more perfectly Mira's adoption is falling into place.  Mira was actually born the on the same day that Kaili had her court date.  I had spent the whole day worrying that all the court papers were in order and that everything was running smoothly not even knowing that God had different plans and instead our baby was being BORN on that day!

So...all that to say.  My continued hope is that I will be able to give EVERYTHING completely to God and trust that 1)he really does care and wants what is best for us and  2)Has orchestrated the entire universe and therefore can handle orchestrating our small, short lives.

My prayer is that without worrying, we can entrust our precious little one into God's perfect hands!